Contemporary Ways to Send Condolences

Newer Methods to Extend Sympathy to Someone Who Has Faced a Loss

Oct 29, 2009 Kirsti A. Dyer

There are newer ways of conveying condolences to someone who has experienced a loss. These include sending an email, IM or Text message or sending a tweet on Twitter.

The introduction of newer technologies like computers and cell phones have resulted in different ways to extend sympathies to someone who has experienced the death of a loved one or another loss. These more contemporary ways of conveying condolences include sending an email, IM or Text message.

People are even sending messages of condolences, sympathy tweets and announcing deaths with RIP tweets on Twitter.

When considering using any of the more contemporary ways of sending condolences, there are six questions to ask before you hit send. These questions will help the sender to consider some of the issues and etiquette for involved in sending condolences by email, text or instant message.

Contemporary Ways to Send Condolences

The newer technology methods that are being used to send condolences include email, IM (Instant Message) , Text messages and Twitter messages or Tweets.

Send an Email
Send an IM
Send a Text Message
Send a Tweet on Twitter

Send Condolences by Email

When thinking sending email condolences the sender needs to consider the type of communication he or she normally has with the person who has experienced a loss. Newer technology etiquette advocates indicates that it may be perfectly acceptable to send sympathies with an email message if this is how the person has been informed of a death or a loss. Sending email sympathies may also be acceptable if the sender may interact with the grieving person before a note or letter might reach him or her by snail mail.

After sending an email, the sender should follow up by sending one the more traditional sympathy methods like a card, note or letter.

Send Condolences by an IM (Instant Message)

When sending condolences by an IM or instant message, this would be sending a message that appears instantly, usually as a pop-up on a computer or as a message on someone's phone.

One big concern with an instant message is that the message is delivered instantaneously to the receiver. An instant condolence message could be disruptive to someone who receives it in the workplace. In general, condolences are not messages that require instant delivery or instant responses. Other ways of sending condolences might be more appropriate than an instant message.

Send Condolences by Text Message

Younger people commonly use Text Messaging or IM (instant message) to break up with each other. Even so, the general consensus by etiquette and bereavement experts is that Texting and IMs should not be used for more serious topics.

Serious topics, such as the death of a loved one, a major loss or breaking up with someone you are dating are not considered appropriate topics for sending a text message. Yet it appears that Twitter is breaking many of these etiquette guidelines.

Send a Message on Twitter

The social media tool Twitter is becoming a way for people and news sites to announce deaths. Twitter is also becoming a way for people to send sympathies and condolences. Twitter is quickly becoming a place where people can post R.I.P. messages or their condolences after the death of a well-known person. Tweeting condolences and R.I.P. tweets is one way for people to create a community of support in grief, by sharing and mourning the loss of a well-known person in an online setting.

Sympathy tweets are a way to send condolences to prominent people in various industries who have experienced a loss. One observation of the R.I.P. posts on Twitter is that people post these messages to acknowledge a recent death. The Summer of 2009 saw the deaths of many prominent people and resulted in a barrage of R.I.P. tweets.

As with the other newer forms of social media, one should consider some of the newer etiquette and the relationship with the recipient before sending a condolence Tweet on Twitter.

Using the Contemporary Ways to Send Condolences

Email, IM (Instant Message), text messages and Twitter messages or Tweets are some of the newer technology methods available for people to use in daily communication. Users of these new technologies need to be careful needs to be taken when considering using these more informal ways of communicating difficult topics like the death of a loved one.

The existing rule of thumb is to consider how the receiving person would feel and react if they received an email, IM or text message. If the sender realizes that their message might be one they would regret sending later, then they should reconsider using one of the more traditional ways of sending condolences, like by card or letter.

The copyright of the article Contemporary Ways to Send Condolences in Personal Development is owned by Kirsti A. Dyer. Permission to republish Contemporary Ways to Send Condolences in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.