It seems that in any group of women, in any situation, be it a competition, the workplace, the beauty salon, school or anywhere you can possibly conceive, there will be an instance of extreme envy or jealousy among women.
If you watch reality television — which most of America does — any house full of women will most certainly contain at least one contestant who has a problem with jealousy or envy.
Women seem to find it difficult to compliment and appreciate beauty, status, accomplishments, or even a single nice feature on another woman. On the other hand, a group of men will find it easy to begin conversations and even compliment or congratulate each others' accomplishments. The problem of jealousy in women is not new and can stem from any number of sources.
Jealous or Envious?
The number one source of jealousy is, no doubt, insecurity. While this is not an attempt to address all the reasons that women can have self-esteem issues, it is worth investigating a few simple ways that women can "just get along!"
Women often view the presence of another female as a signal for automatic competition, which spurs feelings of jealousy and envy. Women need to learn to celebrate what is good about each of them, versus looking at what they do not have. In the end, it just makes a person look bad to everyone when she needs to find something on another woman that she can attack, in an effort to hide her own flaw.
What is Good About You?
Every woman should have a list of great things that are uniquely her at the top of her mind whenever she feels insecure! There are any number of things that make you exactly who you are. What are these things? Only you can answer that, but it is something worth investigating.
If you find that you do not know what is good about you, then that is a great place to start! Perhaps your lack of knowledge about yourself is the precise reason you find it problematic to exist harmoniously among other women.
Here are a few things that may help you figure out what makes you special:
- What does your husband, lover, or best friend love about you?
- What do you strive to become?
- What are your strengths?
If, after doing any one or all of these things, you still do not know what is wonderful about yourself, then know going in, that it is very possible that you are a victim of the green-eyed monster and you need to get it in check as soon as possible. If nothing else, try to remember this. Life is not a competition. Just be you and appreciate those who are being themselves.
Further Reading
Jealousy is not a new problem. If you would like to review and/or read some of the studies by professionals in the field, check out Woman's Inhumanity to Women by Phyllis Chesler, who has written extensively on the subject.
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