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The Importance of Sexual CommunicationImproving Relationships by Increasing Care
Sexual communication is one of the most challenging and most essential aspects of a relationship. Learn what to ask and how to ask it to improve your love life!
Despite the prevalence of sexual images in the media, leading to the expectation that having a great sex life is easy, good sexual communication is still one of the most difficult things to achieve in a relationship. Letting your loved one know what you like in bed requires honesty and patience. Your desires also change over time. Sexual communication is thus an evolving process. Improving how you talk about love making will increase the closeness of your relationship and make it more likely to last! Knowing you don’t know everythingEvery woman and man is unique in terms of how they like to be touched. Even if you have a wealth of sexual experience, you may not understand how your particular partner feels. Some enjoy rough play; some gentle. Some like frequent sex; some irregular intercourse. Some women can orgasm with mild manual stimulation; some require the use of sex toys. Not presuming you know what your partner likes is the first step to asking them what they want. Asking the right questionsBegin by touching your partner gently and, while you’re doing so, asking them what they like. Do you enjoy having your nipples squeezed? Do you like your neck nibbled? Is this enough pressure on your clitoris? Are deep thrusts comfortable for you? Once they let you know what they appreciate in bed, remember, this doesn’t mean that one’s range of sexual desires doesn’t have to be reviewed throughout a relationship. It does mean that your partner wants to feel heard. It can be annoying and a turn-off to have to answer questions every time you have sex. Even more frustrating is feeling that you wasted your time letting your partner know what you like only to have him or her forget! Being open minded and non-judgmentalAlong with feeling heard, most people want to feel that their desires are normal, or at least acceptable to you. Some women and men enjoy being tied up during sex, or like visual stimulation, or appreciate the use of a range of toys. Even if you aren’t experienced in this practice, the worst response you can have is disgust, shock or other signs that you are disturbed by their desires. If you love or care about the person, you will want them to feel good in the way that makes them happy. While you don’t have to do anything that makes you feel comfortable, neither should you make them feel odd or unclean for enjoying those forms of arousal. Most importantly, make your partner feel good about their bodies and never draw attention to their flaws. Being criticized for things you cannot change is the ultimate turn-off. Maintaining care and trustIf you feel that your partner really cares about you, you’re more likely to be able to tell them what you like. Knowing that your significant other wants to listen, learn and expand the pleasures of your sex life will make you open up to them. A solid level of trust in your partner helps you to feel that they won’t share this information with others outside the relationship, betray you or deliberately hurt you. Your sexual communication is sure to improve and with it, the overall quality of your relationship.
The copyright of the article The Importance of Sexual Communication in Improving Relationships is owned by Catherine Owen. Permission to republish The Importance of Sexual Communication in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.
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